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Funny Political Cartoons Jokes Quotes Pictures Memes Pics Images Photos Pictures

An English guy was very ill and his son went to visit him in the hospital. Suddenly, the father began to breathe heavily and grabbed the pen and pad by the bed. With his last ounce of strength he wrote a note, dropped it, and died.

The son was so overcome with grief that he didn't remember slipping the note into his pocket. At the funeral, he reached into the pocket of his coat and immediately felt the note. He excitedly read it thinking it might be something he could recite during the service. It said:

YOU WANKER -- GET OFF MY OXYGEN PIPE!!
Santa apni grlfrnd k saath 1st date pe : Ye meri pehli date hai darling agr koi galti ya kami reh jaye toh chhota bhai samajh k maaf kr dena.

Sardar ko sapne me ek ladki ne chappal mari,
2 din tak sardar apne bank nahi gaya,
Qnki bank me likha tha..
“hum aapke sapne ko hakikat me badalte hain”

Santa: I’ve Been Sending E-mails To William Shakespare…
Banta: William Shakespare Is Dead, Stupid…
Santa: No Wonder He Hasn’t Replied As Well…

Santa: Yaar Uth Bhukamp Aa Raha Hai, Saara Ghar Hil Raha Hai.
Banta: Soja-Soja Ghar Girega To Makaan Maalik Ka, Hum To Kirayedar Hain..

SANTA Ghar Ka Darwaza Ukhaad Ke Kandhe Pe Rakh Ke Ja Raha Tha.
Kisi Ne Puchha: Oye Kahan Ja Rahe Ho?
SANTA:Chabi kho gyi h Taala Khulwanay ja rha hun..........

Santa: Should I Buy Tickets For My Children.?
Conductor: Yes! Only If They Are Above 8.
Santa: Thank God ,I Have Only 6 Children..!!

Salesman-Which Soap U Use?
Santa-BABA’S Soap,BABA’S Paste,BABA’S Brush.
Salesman-Is BABA’S
An INTERNATIONAL Company?
SAnta: Baba Is My Room Mate

History teacher asked Santa: Name kalidas’s brother who was a shoemaker.
Santa: Adidas

Santa : Among My 4 Sons 3 R Engineers
Frnd:4th?
Santa : Useles,Dnt Study, Becam A Barber
Frnd:Y ,Dnt U Throw Him Out
Santa : Coz He’s D Only 1 Who Earns..!

Judge: Y U’ve stolen money 4m dis man?
Sardar: My lord I’ve nt stolen money. He jst gave it 2 me
Judge: Whn He gave U money ?
Sardar: Whn I showd him gun

Santa’s wife dies. He is calm, but his wife’s lover is crying furiously…
Finally, santa consoles him: Don’t worry buddy, I will marry again.

Santa : Soch Raha Hu Ki USA Ghumaun,
Kitna Paisa Lagega?
Banta : Kuch B Nahi
Santa : Kaise?
Banta : Sochne K Liye Paise Nahi Lagte

Santa: Mujhe Shadi Me BMW Mili He.
Banta: Pr Tumhare Pass To Koi Car Nahi He!
Santa: Abye Ghadhe,
BMW Ka Matlab
Bahut Motti Wife

Preeto 2 maid:
Oh Kanta, I have 2 suspect that
Banta is having an affair with his secretary.
Kanta: I don’t believe it!
U r just trying 2 make me jealous.

A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I've got to take you in, pal. You're obviously drunk."

Our wasted friend asked, "Officer, are ya absolutely sure I'm drunk?"

"Yeah, buddy, I'm sure," said the copper. "Let's go."

Wife : I will die.

Husband : I will also die.

Wife : why do u want to die?

Husband : because main itni khushi bardasht nahi kar sakta.

Khabardar Miss Call Sehat Ke Liye Muzir Hai Tabiat Ziada Kharab Ho To Call Kijiye Tamam Sms Waldain Ki Pohanch Se Door Rakhye Vizarat-E-Tum Hakoomat-E-Hum

Aey Eid Key Chand! Keyun karta hai tu ham ko pareshan

Tujhay dekhne ke liye baichain hain ham aur mufti Muneeb-ur-Rehman

Tujhay daikh nahi pate poray Pakistan key insan

Per Kahan say dohnd leta hai tujhay Peshawar ka Pathan,

Dekha tujhe to rooh khush ho gayi,

Ek kami thi vo bhi puri ho gayi,

Pagal hain vo log jo kehte hain ki,

Chimpanzi ki aakhri nasal kahin kho gayi!

Mohabat me dekho, kia mukaam paiya hai

haath pair toote, muh se khoon aaiya hai

hospital pahunche to nurso ne kuch yu farmaiya hai ..

baharon phool barsao